Top Twelve: Pushing Away from the Table

All but done with donut(s)

I posted one entry in 2015, a clear sign that other endeavours have wooed me away from writing about hockey (and donuts).  

Oh, I have many other stories I’d like to tell here, but it’s time to say an official “see you later” with one more Top Twelve collection—this one focused on the activities, people and places that, in the last year or so, have provided relief, gratitude and even joyfulness as way to combat my often irrational fear and anxiety.

Reading

Ron Maclean’s Hockey Towns: Untold Stories from the Heart of Canada; George Henderson’s Krazy George Still Krazy After All These Cheers; and Clint Malarchuk’s A Matter of Inches, the latter of which I finished reading in Montreal.

Montreal, QC

I didn’t skate on Puckbite’s backyard rink. Way too cold. But, the Habs-loving, late-blooming hockey player and yours truly enjoyed lunch and a long philosophical discussion about hockey and the arts.

My wife and I visited several familiar places and a new donut establishment, in La Petite-Italie. Our Russian cabbie, a friendly historian who knows his way around town, delivered us to Le Trou de Beigne, where we bought these donuts, some of which we shared with the doorman at our hotel, some of which we ate, and a lot of which we had to sacrifice for art’s sake.

North Carolina

Getting Silly with "Stormy"

Another wonderful friend, much like Puckbite, lives in Charlotte. Hockey isn’t such a big deal there, so we drove north.

In Raleigh, college football outranks professional hockey, but the PNC Arena is a fantastic venue to watch a Hurricanes game. Even though the Dallas Stars beat the home team, we still enjoyed affordable seats near the player’s bench, the “Two in the Box” video segment and pulled pork.

In Durham, the hot spot is Monuts Donuts. Unique donut and coffee options contribute to the flair of this tavern that, of course, serves Sierra Nevada Tropical IPA and Irish Coffee.

Ireland

The Nutella-covered cronut at Krust Bakery was the best tasting donut in Dublin. The Boston Cream at The Natural Bakery in Donnybrook made me feel at home.

Bostonians beware: I saw lots of people sporting NY Yankees caps and not a single Dubliner wearing Red Sox merchandise.

I didn’t see a Celtics, Bruins or Sox fan in Galway either, but that’s not something I worried about while savoring the porridge at the House Hotel—in the heart of the Latin Quarter. ¡Qué bueno!

Dave Gosher and Bob Beers

Gosher calls such a great Bruins game on the radio that sometimes my wife and I turn off the TV’s sound. Three weeks ago on the Sports Hub 98.5 hockey show, Beers said it’s unrealistic to expect the Bruins to be perfect every game. Every NHL team goes through ups and downs. This kind of broadcasting is refreshing and supports my efforts to tap into gratitude, dare I say love.

Patrice Bergeron and Brad Marchand

I love these guys. How blessed are we here in Boston to have this duo on the same line and same penalty killing unit? Definitely an odd pairing, but what’s not to love as they demonstrate their mutual affection in this Valentine’s Day video? The only thing missing is a love song.

Nashville, TN

Some Nashville hockey fans may be tired of Tim McGraw’s “I like it, I love it” after every goal the Predators score, but my wife and I heard it five times as the hometown team defeated the St. Louis Blues. I couldn’t get enough of it.

My afternoon at the Country Music Hall of Fame rivaled the hockey game for entertainment value. The Keith Urban exhibit, which includes an autographed Quebec Nordiques T-shirt, and chatting with a visitor from Toronto in front of the cowboy music displays, made me happy.

My wife took a poolside photograph of  a “100 Layer Donut” from Five Daughters Bakery as I listened to a Garth Brooks tune streaming from our hotel’s speakers.

West Point, NY

Getting to re-connect with a relative who plays for the Black Knights was extra special.

Even if you’re not a hockey fan, West Point is a beautiful place to visit. I didn’t see a donut dispenser on campus, but you’ll find outstanding soda bread and cider donuts a few miles up the road, at Jones Farm.

Writing

Most every Friday morning at the Boston Bean House, I’m working on a historical novel. If you love hockey or Canadian-American history, this book may be for you. Someday. (By the way, my hockey and donut memoir is still on the to-complete list, but it needs a wee more bit editing and time to mature.)

The AMHL

“You still got it,” Donut Boy told me while I, in my street clothes, shot the puck into the net. He was skating after the game, as he always does, and I wasn’t— but that didn’t matter. His compliment lifted my spirits.

I’ve had so much fun playing hockey with Donut Boy and all the other men and women that make the AMHL so special. As I re-read some of the stories I’ve written (and had forgotten about), I’m so glad to have been part of the league, as a player and writer, and for friends like Donut Boy.

Exercise

I haven’t skated since last fall but planks and long walks, in the cities we’ve visited and here at home in Maynard, have become my friends.

Less Pain

My groin and hip pain has decreased in frequency, intensity and duration. I’m not cured of it and there are flare-ups. But, thanks to my wife, exercise, pelvic floor therapy, my chiropractor, playing the guitar, prayer, music, meditation, my psychologist and countless others who care about me, I remain gratefully yours.

Thank you—gracias, merci, obrigado, shokran, spaciba, Go raibh maith agaibh—to all the readers over the world and to those who also shared their hockey (and/or donut) stories. Thanks for such an enlightening and magical ten-year gig.

See you on LinkedIn, email, the golf course, the rink…maybe someday here on this site again, or wherever our paths may cross again.

Update:
21 March 2017

You can now read my new blog, stories I tell about learning Spanish--in particular about pronunciation.

Top Twelve: “Happy” Hockey, Happy Canada, (Happy Donuts)

Last week I asked co-workers about earworms. “Happy,” someone said, but the song gets too much airplay.

AMHL Tuesday Champs: The Penguins

Never heard of it.

But now that I’ve listened to Pharrell Williams’s hit, the song has stuck itself to my psyche and has prompted my fingers to Google the heck out of “Happy,” hockey, Canada (and donuts). The investigation spawned these personal reflections about gratitude, so I present—may sound unreal what I’m ‘bout to reveal—these Top Twelve “Happy” highlights:

1.      Team Italy Sledge Hockey: They could complain about their missing limbs but instead have chosen to be “Happy.”

2.      Happy in Kelowna: Happy (and a hockey player) beats hate.

3.      The Happy Donut: Free Fritter Friday makes me smile like the blue-eyed donut logo. Myrtle Creek, Oregon is on my to-donut list.

4.      Happy Hockey in Hingham (MA): An eleven-or twelve-year old, awarded a penalty shot, juked the goalie—and himself. The goalie flopped, and the skater toppled before the latter could shoot. As the forlorn youth skated to his bench, an opponent skated behind him and offered encouragement or empathy or some “Happy” thought. At least I hope that’s what happened.

5.      Happy for Can-Am Connection # 1: Our friends from PEI, attending the Hingham hockey tournament, paid for dinner. Good times talking about hockey and (lemon) donuts.

6.      Bruins vs. Canadiens: I’m happy that Shawn Thornton accepted P. K. Subban’s apology.

7.      Happy in Montreal: McGill students go overboard in Underground City.

8.      Happy in Halifax: The patients and staff at the Nova Scotia Rehabilitation Centre find their “Happy” place. I especially enjoyed the Hula-Hoopers.

9.      Happy to read about St. Andrews, NB in the Boston Globe: See you, St. Andrews—the safe house, Niger Reef and Honeybeans, in six weeks.

10.  Happy Youth Hockey: Jay Atkinson’s piece in the Boston Globe Magazine highlights the need for more fun, less fighting for a scholarship.

11.  Happy for Can-Am Connection #2: The AMHL Photographer and I will return to Montreal next weekend. Round Two between the Bruins and Canadiens will be over, but Puckbite and I will still be friends.

12.   AMHL Championship: Happy to hear that Tim Cook won his first-ever AMHL championship as a goalie, leading his Penguins to a 3–2 victory over the Leafs.

13.  (Baker’s Dozen) Happy to be writing: Not so much on this site as I’m writing offline to rebuild Seamus J. O’Sheehan’s Castle.

Boston Bruins: My All-time Team

My wife asked me who I’d include on my all-time Bruins team. On the bench (and behind it), the list below has less to do with the players’ popularity or statistics than it soes with my personal connection to them.

Coaches:

Claude Julien, Don Cherry, Pat Burns. Who would be the head coach? Would they rotate executive leadership? I love Julien’s patience and imperviousness to those who question his line combinations. Grapes: Colourful with words and attire. Pat Burns: My wife once got special access to one of his press conferences (thanks, Steve Babineau) and developed a crush on Burnsie.

Goalies:

I didn't see Gerry Cheevers play, but I read about him first in George Plimpton’s book, “Open Net.” Cheesie was kind to me when he signed my copy of his memoir, “Unmasked.” Tim Thomas: Before the off-ice shenanigans tarnished his image, Timmy was superb between the pipes and delivered uncommon post-game quotes.

Defensemen:

Sorry Number fORR; I never saw you play and haven't met you yet. My wife and I did fly to the Big D to watch Ray Bourque, though. Ray-Ray (as my wife calls him), still wearing his Boston Bruins-issue hockey pants (magic marker couldn’t cover completely cover the Spoked B) was twenty days removed from The Trade. He logged more ice time than any other player as his Avalanche beat the Stars, 2–1. Don Sweeney, Bourque’s defensive partner, was under-sized and under-rated. One of the fastest players on any Bruins squad he played for, Sweeney’s work ethic and commitment to the Bruins lands him on my list. Gary Doak's  heyday was before my time here in Boston, but I hear tell of his shot-blocking acumen. Aaron Ward: His dedication to blocking shots and his proclivity with a stiff-arm to an opponent’s chest (as well as his fondness for the Boston Kreme) make him a favourite. Hal Gill: Yet another Boston Kreme fan, his most memorable goal was against the Avalanche (February 2003), a crafty shot from beyond the blueline that beat Patrick Roy.

Centers:

Patrice “Selke” Bergeron's demeanor and dedication to defense, as well as his face-off skills, endear fans to him. Derek Sanderson, who was also great on the draw, owned (owns?) a nobby Nehru jacket and a neat nickname. Reading Turk's memoir gave me hope for those who strive to redeem themselves. Jean Ratelle was before my time, too, but my dad (a Rangers fan) rooted for him. I’ve heard only fine things about Gentleman Jean.

Right Wings:

Stephen Herbert Heinze: I like this guy because he had the audacity to wear #57 (but not as a Bruin) and because I owned one of his game-used hockey sticks. I recall skating on a pond in Stow (MA), cradling the puck with that twig (remember my motto: wood is good). Willie O’Ree: Well-known for being the first black player in the NHL (again, before my hockey days), people respect him for his off-ice attributes. For example, he excused himself from his lunch guest to share, with my wife and me (on vacation in New Brunswick), his excitement about the Bruins winning the Cup in 2011. He said that after the Bruins swept the Flyers, he knew the B’s would go all the way. Miroslav Satan: The fire in the outside pit crackled and hissed as my wife and I joined a friend for Hockey Night in Hudson (MA). At this backyard gathering on a Saturday night in April 2010, we watched Satan score twice—the second goal in OT as the Bruins beat the Leafs.

Left Wings:

My wife’s favourite player is Marco Sturm. Whether he’s on a Bruins behind-the scenes show, wearing lederhosen, or front and center, scoring the game-winning goal in the 2010 NHL Winter Classic, Sturmie's smile is magnetic. John Bucyk: More Ukranian than Native North American, “Chief” is a happy go lucky whistler; at least that’s the way he seemed off-camera. Per Johan Axelsson: At a Wives' Charity Carnival (the year escapes me), I told him I admired his commitment to defense. “That’s my game,” he said. That was before he scored this beauty to beat the Blackhawks in 2008.

Healthy Scratch:

John Wensink played for my Colorado Rockies, but I don’t remember any of his game action. His wild hair and how his tough-guy persona is tempered by his fascination with doll houses (as documented in “Open Net”) means he belongs here.

 

 

Meet Monika Moravan: Hockey Writer, Editor, and Researcher

Monika Moravan, the ghost writer for CONCUSSED!, may not be a household name in the hockey community. At least I hadn’t heard of her until last month. Nonetheless, she’s a maven storyteller. Besides contributing to Keith Primeau and Kerry Goulet’s book—mandatory reading for every hockey player, parent, coach and anyone else concerned about what’s damaging brains and our game—Moravan has written for publications such as The Hockey News, the Hockey Hall of Fame 2010 Induction Program, and the Toronto Star. A freelance journalist and editor for the Society for International Hockey Research, Moravan also loves donuts.

I learned about her at LinkedIn while researching CONCUSSED! We traded email and then spoke on the phone. I present to you edited exchanges as we discussed a half dozen topics.

Donuts

Regular readers know what my favourites are. When Moravan learned about them, she responded to my email inquiry.

MM: Walnut crunch and chocolate frosted? We're going to get along just fine! In college a friend of mine was a baker at Tim Hortons—back in the day when they still used an ' between "n" and "s" and baked fresh in–store. If I was pulling an all-nighter, he'd call to tell me when my favourites would be flying out of the deep-fryer, now that's a chivalry.

CONCUSSED! and Violence in Hockey

MM: (The book launch) went very very well. Keith’s book received a great deal of support. Keith Primeau was actually supposed to be part of the Hockey Canada panel discussing concussions, but he was fogged out—or fogged in—due to the weather.

JD: When you first said “fogged” I though he’s got concussion symptoms again.

MM: That was the funny part of it. He’s feeling better now than he has in quite some time. It’s easier on him to fly. For quite a while he couldn’t handle that. But he was looking forward to coming up here, but you know, you can be 6’ 5” and a power forward and Mother Nature is still going to get you.

JD: Concussions are random, right, they’re so unpredictable. Some people you’d think would have all sorts of problems, don’t; some get what they think is a slight injury that just doesn’t really ever go away.

MM: That’s the thing that what they’re teaching now right from minor hockey. It doesn’t have to be a big collision. Everyone’s body and brain responds differently. You can have something that looks very nasty—going into the boards— and you’re okay. And then you can have something else where you’re tying your laces and trip in the dressing room, and you’re not (okay)... My son’s a goalie. The kids now are all 13 and 14, so you know they’re just trying to test their strengths, see what they can get away with, and whether they can fire that shot at the head.

JD: I think players get mixed emotions. I know you’re a big fan of Adam Proteau, and I read his book on violence in the league, which I thought was outstanding, but I think as a fan…you want all this dynamic stuff and the heavy hitting that’s up on the Jumbotron, selling this stuff than fans want. The players want to appease the fans, but they also have to protect themselves. It’s a tough spot to be in. (For the record, I’ve lost my appetite for fighting.)

MM: I’ve never been fan of fighting in hockey. I like strong physical games, clean open ice hits. That’s what I love. To give you an idea: When I was a kid, it was the era of the Broad Street Bullies. I was so happy that Montreal came along and won all those Cups. To me, that’s perfect hockey the way Montreal played. I judged all of hockey against the mid-70s Montreal teams. It was physical when it had to be. It was skilled. It was clean…

JD: I think the only way (fighting) is going to stop is if fans just say it’s enough…I don’t see the league or players moving in (that direction.)…hockey is so crazy; it doesn’t make any sense: You have the college game that doesn’t have fighting. And then you have the pros that do, but then you have the playoffs and international competition where it’s not there.

MM: Surveys that have come out indicate that the players aren’t willing to take fighting out of the game completely. Now interestingly enough, when you talk to players about how they got their concussion, their worst ones, (they) didn’t happen in a fight. But there’s no way— if you want to get rid of head trauma, how can you allow a punch to the head?...It could also take a generation or two to change. Look at helmets…Hockey, like anything, is cyclical: You’ll go through, I mentioned earlier, the Broad Street Bullies era; then you go through neutral zone trap era, and then it opens up a bit. I think it takes a while of going through these sets of cycles to really engrain something. A lot of guys wouldn’t think of going out on ice without helmets (now).

Part II

AMHL Championship Week: Top Twelve Quotes and the Koffey CUPdates

The venerable Koffey Cup (KC) has been stolen, or mayhap last season’s champions have forgotten to return the hardware to Valley Sports Arena, where this week’s championship games have commenced. Where is KC? An inquiry to AMHL Commissioner Mitchell Weiss is in order.

Until we determine KC’s whereabouts, we celebrate another stellar season of morning hockey. I present then, to AMHL fans worldwide, the top twelve quotes (what the hey, I’ll make it a baker’s dozen) from last week’s action.  

Tuesday

May 1, 2012

Leafs vs. Penguins

1.      “Penalty shot!” The Leafs beg referee Matt Bielak to call foul play against the Leafs Kevin McDonald for whacking and hacking at Penguin Rob Mirak as the latter skated toward goalie Leafs goalie Tyler Boudreau. Bielak, his mind already made up, raises his arms, his wrists connected and hands forming a V: penalty shot.

Mirak skates straight toward Boudreau, dekes left to his forehand and then shuffles right. Boudreau thrusts his left leg to meet the puck. No goal.

2.      “I don’t give those away like candy, my friend,” Bielak says as play is about to resume. “You have to earn them.”

3.      “You got your Marco Sturm moment,” the AMHL Photographer says to this reporter.

She’s referring to the ex-Boston Bruin’s OT game-winner against the Flyers, his subsequent power leap at the Plexiglas at the 2010 Winter Classic and Kevin MacDonald, who has just celebrated the Leafs’ 5–2 victory by raising both arms and launching himself at the Plexiglas near center ice.

4.      “You gotta against these guys...Dennis Seidenberg is my hero.” -Leaf defenseman Bill Chioffi, on why he resisted temptations to join the offensive rush and stay at home.

5.      “I know what I’m gonna where to work today.” -Chris “Donut Boy” Howell on the AMHL T-shirts awarded to the victors.

Wednesday

May 2, 2012

Sabres vs. Canadiens

6.      “No media in the locker room,” says Stephen “Whoa Nelli” Antonelli as he leads the victorious (3–0) Sabres into the room.

7.      KC: (think: Lenny Clarke) “It’s all good fellahs. Mitch is finally coughin’ up the dough to replace that broken crown uh mine. I know I’m not in the team pic-shah, but my career ain’t ovah ‘til I say it’s ovah. Not sure when I’ll be back. I cont make it tuh-day. But Denis Leary is taking care of me…so no need to rescue me.”

Thursday

May 3, 2012

Panthers vs. Bruins

8.      KC: “Ah you for real? Boys, yah killin’ me,” he says after learning that, in the team photo, he has been replaced by a pylon topped with Kenny “KISS Fan” Tarr’s mask.

9.      “I just had to be average,” says Kenny “KISS Fan” Tarr after his Panthers beat the Bruins, 4–2. He gave all the credit to his teammates, like Peter “Focused” Kokas, who scored a backhand goal from the non-Euclidian corner.

10.  “I’m going to boycott my nose,” this reporter says as Chris Howell, his pickup truck’s radio tuned to NPR and a story about striking workers, drives through Maynard. “What?” Howell asks? “I’m going to picket” I say. “That’s bad.”

Friday

May 4, 2012

Stars vs. Kings

11.  “It’s back,” The AMHL Photographer says. KC, gleaming in refurbished glory—his new coffee cup emblazoned with the Stars and Stripes and the Maple Leaf—waits for the champions to carry him into the locker room.

12.  “Anyone need a double extra large besides me?” asks the slender Gerry Evans, the Stars’ stand-up comedian.

13.  KC: “Me and Mahshall McLean—you know he scahhed fotty-two goals for the Stahs this season—ah gonna go to New Hampshuh. He’s gonna take me to the top uh Mt. Cahdigan. Can you believe it? Me and Mahshall!

Five-holes and Donut-holes: True Stories about Professional Hockey Players and Their Favourite Donuts

There’s a hole in the title. Professional goalies aren’t the only players featured here. The title, courtesy of creative collaborator Msr. Jean-Pierre Plouffe, (a.k.a. Puckbite) is a teaser, an appetizer à la the Timbit or Munchkin, to introduce those whose skills and diligence are or were sharp enough to play professional—at any position. Regardless of their goals-against average or plus/minus rating, each of the players listed below, like those of us not destined for hockey divinity, share an affinity; dare I say weakness, for that oft-round and tasty treat: We are all rendered enervated and yield to the yeasty (or cakey, as the case may be) feast that is the donut.

For the uninitiated: The hockey-donut convergence originates from my affiliation with the best morning hockey league evah, where would-be beer-leaguers are more prone to retire to bed before midnight, awaken before dawn, and then drive to Valley Sports Arena in Concord, MA. There in the venerable arena, we partake in the conviviality—the joie de vivre of the hockey and donut dream—that the AMHL (as in 6:30 A.M Hockey League) promises. This amateur co-ed confederation of pucksters/donut connoisseurs loves hockey and the post-game staple just as much as the pros love our game and donuts.

Gerry Cheevers: A few minutes before the Bruins-Islanders game on March 3, 2012, Cheesie sat at a small table outside the Bruins Pro Shop. My wife/AMHL Photographer then went inside to purchase Unmasked, Cheevers’s autobiography, written with Marc Zappulla. Book in hand, I approached the former netminder. We chatted about his hometown, St. Catharines Ontario, the Don Cherry-Colorado Rockies connection...and then I asked him about his favourite donut. “Chocolate Glazed,” he said. “Just had one.” (A portion of the poceeds from Unmasked will go to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.

Hal Gill: While the under-appreciated, in my opinion, defenseman was in Finland (during the 2004-05 NHL Lockout, Gill played for Rauman Lukko), he responded to my email query: His favorite Dunkin’ Donut franchise: “In Wilmington (MA) across from the practice rink (Ristuccia).” His favorite donut: “What else, the (Boston Kreme). It’s perfection washed down with a French Vanilla coffee.”

Aaron Ward: In 2008, at the first annual ‘Cuts for a Cause, a fundraiser for the MassGeneral Hospital for Children, I shaved Wardo’s head (true story). Afterwards, I asked him...you know... Because he lived in Carolina, the crucible of Krispy Kreme, I expected Wardo to promote his hometown favourite. “Boston Kreme,” he said. “True story.”

Adam McQuaid: In San Jose for the Bruins-Sharks game on March 22, 2012, the AMHL Photographer and I learned we were staying in the same hotel as the Bruins. As the B’s waited in the lobby for the bus to take them to the Shark Tank, my wife and I approached Mr. Mullett, a.k.a. Darth Quaider. My wife chatted about our visits to Prince Edward Island, McQuaid’s home province, and then she acquired his autograph for her co-worker. My turn. I introduced myself and the notion of morning hockey, handed McQuaid my business card, and then asked him The Question. “Krispy Kreme,” he said. I told him I’m not a big fan of that brand because the donuts are too perfect. No character. Upon further reflection, I accept them as part of the donut family, although their lack of flair could be considered akin to a mullet-less McQuaid.

Terry O’Reilly: At the Honda Center, before the Bruins would beat the Ducks, Taz walked along the mezzanine. I introduced myself and my purpose. Favourite donut? He paused to ponder The Question, so I prompted him with another: Perhaps something from the Land of Dunkin’? (By the way, I didn’t see one DD shop in California.) “Maple Frosted,” he said. I didn’t have a business card handy, so I told him if he Googled donut and hockey, he’d find me. He repeated my name, as if to consider searching for this true story.

Pittsburgh Flour Power: Peace and Love (and Little Donuts)

Saturday March 10, 2012

Pittsburgh, PA

Donuts, little ones, man. Here in the City of Bridges, feeling the love.

“Feed Your Inner Hippie,” is the catch phrase on Smallman Street, here in the Strip, the historic market district. It ain't Vegas, but it ain’t square. Far from it, you dig?

Groovy donuts (and the Bruins vs. Penguins game tomorrow) have prompted a ten-hour road trip from Milltown (Maynard, MA) to Pittsburgh.

It’s a Steel Town Saturday morning, and the line in the hole-in-the-wall donut shop just off 21st Street is short. Cool.

A cat in a dark pullover accepts the plain ringlets, fresh off the production line, while his female colleagues—one wearing a hoodie with colorful hearts, the other in a funky pullover promoting the shop's peaceful slogan—toil for the man.

"I can guarantee you," the hipster says, “You’re going to like them.”

The first two, a glazed and a sugar-sprinkled, are on the house. Far out, man.

But we can’t eat them yet. Photoshoot material.

Hepcat decorates the other donuts with funky toppings: chocolate chip cookie dough; chocolate, caramel and coconut—a la the cookie the Girl Scouts call a Samoa; raspberry lemonade frosting; maple frosting and bacon chunks.

The donuts, like hippies during a sit-in, occupy two plastic containers. The Photographer and I take them outside. Takin’ the treats to streets, man.

In see-your-breath cold, my wife places different donuts on a parking meter as bemused Pittsburghers nod and smile their approval.

“I like it,” says one dude.

“I’m gonna have to sacrifice the Samoa,” the Photographer says. But then she changes her mind, doesn’t want to place the little donut, its surface sticky and inviting, on the steely counter of the behemoth patio heater on sidewalk.

Picture this: I devour the sugar-sprinkled freebie. Crispy and sweet, man.

We carry the rest of them, now contraband, to the 21st Street Coffee and Tea shop next door. Upstairs, empty coffee bean sacks from Latin America, like the one promoting the Zenda Vista Alegre brand, adorn the walls.

I enjoy a café mocha and the serene scene, visible via the long rectangular window: Unencumbered blue sky above; straight ahead and across Smallman Street, the brick and mortar Pennsylvania Railroad Fruit Auction & Sales Building; and to the right and across 21st Street, Saint Stanislaus Kostka (the patron saint of youth) Church, its majestic brick bracketing the twenty-two foot diameter window.

We share, in true hippie spirit but without the bell bottoms, the already sample-sized donuts. The Photographer savors the first half of the French Toast Strawberry.

“It does taste like French toast,” she says. “I was a little skeptical.”

It’s flavor is, like, sublime as the bells from the Polish church chime, signaling the time: 10:30. I’m diggin’ the vibe. But I need another donut.

Time to split.

Back at Peace, Love & Little Donuts, I get my fix.

Sweet little donut friend of mine, topped with banana and chocolate chips. Oh man, so tasty you are. Better than the rest. Best of the bunch.

Peace out, my flour children.

2011 Top Twelve

Driving from Maynard to Acton to conduct a Christmas present delivery, I took inventory (assist to Michael Buble’s Christmas CD) of last year’s highlights.

1. Learning more about Montreal’s eclectic and authentic Msr. J.P. “Puckbite” Plouffe: His favourite donut, if he had to choose, is the Maple Glaze.

2. Anne Murray’s autobiography, All of Me: You may know her as the “Snowbird” singer, among many other musical successes, but she’s a real hockey hit, too. Ask her brothers and they’ll tell you she knows her way around the rink. And her memoir is sprinkled with references to hockey heroes such as Jean Béliveau, Gordie Howe, and Bobby Orr.

3. Dynamo Donut, San Francisco: En el corazón del Distrito de la Misión, the understated edifice belies the glory and organic goodness demonstrated within—the donut books decorate the back wall; the congenial and quirky staff entertain and engage; and the Apple Maple Bacon beckons.

4. Interviewing Alberta’s King and Queen of Hockey Calendars.

5. The Stanley Cup: Where were you when the Bruins won? I was at home, standing, as the final seconds evaporated…standing again on Tremont Street as the Cup paraded past…And I was on my feet in Boston’s North End, inside Regina Pizzeria when Andrew Ference lifted Lord Stanley’s cherished chalice.

6. Michael Bublé in Manchester, NH: Two nights after his Canucks lost to the Bruins, the humbled hockey fan from Burnaby, BC acknowledged the defeat and then delivered a dynamic performance that brought the crowd to its feet.

7. Score: A Hockey Musical: Bolstered by lyrical dialogue as clever as Crosby on a breakaway, a no-name kid with can’t-miss talent (and pacifist parents) sings and scores his way to personal victory. The cast includes Olivia Newton-John, Nelly Furtado, and Dave Bidini. “Give it a shot.”

8. Ottawa, ON: Bruins on Internet radio, the patina on Parliament Hill, and a new safe house operator and his special agent.

9. The unveiling of a new superhero: Captain CanAmerica.

10. Boston Bruins vs. Winnipeg Jets: Blake Wheeler and Mark Stuart return to the Garden, where the AMHL Photographer and I met a wicked cool family from Winnipeg.

11. Cape Cod: From Hole in One Donuts in North Eastham, to a donut photo shoot at Nauset Beach, to Hyannis, where I enjoyed the donut scene in The Muppets movie.

12. The AMHL: Championship coverage, and more importantly, the everlasting covenant of hockey camaraderie on an off the ice.

Happy New Year/Bonne année et bonne santé

Ohlin's Donut Elves

Sunday October 23, 2011

Belmont, MA

While Ernie and his Keebler elves bake their “Uncommonly Good®” Fudge Stripes and Deluxe Grahams in their Hollow Tree Factory, the elves at Ohlin’s Bakery, near the intersection of Trapelo Road and Common Street prepare to serve their chocolate frosted and honey-dipped donuts this Sunday morning.

At 6:00 a.m. and daybreak more than five dozen minutes away, the sublime intersection of glaze and frosting, yeast and cake, transport me to pre-dawn mornings in 1986-87, when I was a donut elf myself, at the bakery in Toddy’s Supermarket, located at the union of Lemay Avenue and Drake Road in Fort Collins, Colorado.

Working during the wee hours, I would stand on cardboard that lay flat in front of the fryer, and I would watch the bottom half of the doughy circles turn golden brown. Time to make the donuts…turn over. Flipping the ringlets with long slender wooden implements, which resembled drumsticks, classical music from a Bad News Bears movie (more commonly known as Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture) played in my mind’s ear.

Back in Belmont, the donuts on display delight the AMHL (and Donut) Photographer and me. As we ponder our donut selection, we engage the elves in conversation.

The eldest elf, a cheery worker wearing a purple top, says she’s worked at Ohlin's sixteen years. “I married one of the bakers,” she explains, smiling and ready to serve customers.

The donut holes seem as big as a fist. Tempting.

The younger elf, in her late teens and wearing a non-uniform purple top, references the honey-dipped donuts. “We bake and sell more of these than any other,” she says.

My wife is sold, not only on their potential flavor but also on the photogenic flair. Bold and beautiful, these donuts are bound for daytime drama and glory. (Later today, the donuts will witness the wonder of the Head of the Charles Regatta.)

I focus on the fudge-like quality of the chocolate frosting. Fresh and thick and moist, the topping bonds with the bottom. One of these darlings might also be featured in a photo. But how will it taste?

We’re about to learn as we sit in our car—until we realize we’ve forgotten to buy coffee—and then must return to the brick edifice.

Once inside the Hollow Tree Factory, er, bakery, I tell the younger elf that the camera crew is right behind me. The teenager strikes a pose as another elf—this one with a tray of donuts—appears from the kitchen.

We learn that this pixie is Ma Elf’s daughter. Ohlin’s, established in the 1960s, appears to be a family business. The pose-striking elf says she feels like part of the family.

“Does that mean I have to pay for college?” Ma Elf asks, an impish grin forming to complement her pointy (not really) ears.

My wife and I buy two more donuts (and the coffee) and then return to our car.

She bites into the Honey-dipped. “Oh my God,” she says as I anticipate the fudgey frosting of the donut before me. But the selfless Photographer offers me a bite of her donut. The high-def honey-dipped is sticky but not overly so and oh so sweet and warm and wonderful.

I sink my incisors into the Chocolate Frosted: The chocolate melts as the yeast condenses. Magic. I sip the French vanilla coffee. The Earth ceases its spinning.

Those Keeblers have nothing on Ohlin’s donut elves.

AMHL Tuesday Championship: Hockey and a Hooley

Boys-a-dear, all of Ireland is worried that the AMHL Flyers trail the Leafs, 0–3. The visitors are in a wee bit of trouble, without the services they are, of Ryan “Green Machine” O’Connor and Jeremy “Lucky Charms” Doyle. (The two are on loan to the Brampton Blades. During AMHL championship week, no less.)

Right to left we go, then, across your Internet connection, as we follow the Flyers in the second period. Jeff Quinn, a lad who shoots lefty, skates across the Leafs’ blueline and to the right circle. On a two-on-one, he sells the pass across the slot and opts for the shot. Clank. The puck dings the post and then drops behind the goal line.

Less than three minutes later, his teammate, Dave Mello (ends in O but close enough to Irish for hockey fans on the Emerald Isle) threads the needle—a perfect pass through the crease—to the Quinn, who deposits the disc behind netminder Steve Scansaroli.

Back the other way, Leafs forward and Aerosmith attendant John “(With) The Great One” Bionelli, his index finger affixed with white tape to bolster a broken bone, sidesteps a would-be defender inside the blueline. He strides toward Flyer goalie Brian Monahan, who can’t stop Bionelli’s backhand shot.

“Four-two,” says referee Peter Bagley, as the teams contemplate the third period.

Scans, sans his goalie helmet, faces his own goal as he squeezes his beverage bottle and then swallows a refreshing liquid. He secures the helmet on his head and then turns to face Monahan, 185 feet (56 metres) away. And the boys are raring to go.

Monahan faces a two-on-one-attack, his eye focused on the puck. A shot from slot. The disc darts towards the goal, but the backstop makes a toe save.

Mello, the dab-handed passer, and Quinn, the post-hugging finisher, connect, and post-haste the Flyers trail, 3–4.

When the Leafs counter with a goal with a wee more than eleven minutes on the clook, Ireland sighs; the outlook for victory is grim. But might this match make it to overtime?

Bagley nods in affirmation as Doyle and O’Connor, no doubt, watch via streaming video.

The lads witness a kerfuffle in Scans’s crease… the puck is loose—and then Flyer Dev Barron scores. And then, a tad more than a minute later, Mello scores.

“Five-all,” bellows Bagley.

Seems the ref was right. He’s always right, (even when he’s wrong.), some might reckon.

With the seconds evaporating from the clock, and but five minutes remaining, Mello skates into the crease. Thwack, thwack. He bangs his stick’s blade against the ice. Pass the puck to me. A teammate obliges, and then Dave snaps a low shot inside the post to Scans’s left. The lamp is lit, and Dublin is delighted.

Or maybe Bagley was right? Plenty of time for another goal.

The Leafs, led by the AMHL’s all-time scoring leader, will not surrender. Five seconds left in the game, and Dana Salvo lurks in the slot. As all great goal-getters will tell you, they wait for the puck to find them. Two seconds…and as Salvo sets himself for the shot, Monahan falls—feet first—to the occasion. As Salvo shoots, the keeper slides, like, across the crease to save the morning.

Good man ma da Monahan. And all of Ireland is a ta-ta-ta-ra-ing, craking on, having a hooley (and a donut).

The Three Stars, as voted by the media

3. John Bionelli: Hat trick and a picture with Wayne Gretzky
2. Dave Mello: two goals, two assists, and two ould BC socks
1. Jeff Quinn: hat trick and a hug for the Koffey Cup

Honorable mention:

Ould Irish slang: from Patrick Taylor’s “An Irish Country Doctor”
Score: A Hockey Musical
Peter Bagley: Marketing maven, entrepreneur extraordinaire, and remarkable referee

Sharing the Hockey Spirit, Part II: "Alberta Bound"



Courtesy of Hockey Spirit Fundraising Calendars

 (Cont'd from Part I)

I’m Alberta Bound/This piece of heaven that I’ve found/
Rocky Mountains and black fertile ground

Everything I need beneath that big blue sky/Doesn’t matter where I go/
This place will always be my home

-Paul Brandt, “Alberta Bound”

As Brian and Elizabeth Urlacher—the king and queen of hockey calendars—watch the Stanley Cup Finals, they must realize that The Most Coveted Cup is Alberta bound. Will Mason Raymond, the Canuck from Cochrane, AB and teammate Jeff Tambellini, the kid from Calgary, hold high the shiny silver chalice beneath Brandt’s big blue sky? Or will it be Bruins Johnny Boychuk and Andrew Ference—both from Edmonton—that do the honors?

The Canucks lead the series 2–0, and Red Deer’s royalty seem conflicted about their loyalty: Elizabeth, whose favourite donut at Tim Hortons is the Boston Cream (renamed, at least temporarily, to the Vancouver Cream), writes, “…Andrew Ference–our Alberta boy! That’s top-shelf reason enough for us to be thrilled to see the Bruins win. We also hold tight to all things Canucks…Go Canada Go! This is a unique playoff series because we’re going to be stoked for who ever wins! It’s nice to be in such a friendly cheering position.”


A week later, and a day before Game Six in Boston, the Canucks up 3–2, the Urlachers call to clarify their written comments. Elizabeth says, “I’m gonna answer for myself, Brian (who then laughs). My loyalties always go to first of all, to our closest team. My second thought on that is if that if by chance the Bruins win, that I’d be so happy for my friend, Barry Wheeler in Corner Brook, Newfounldand that that’s just great too.”

Canuck goalie Roberto Luongo's home and away ups and downs, she says, as well as the see-saw victory pattern, have contributed to the saga of this Stanley Cup finals.

The queen yields to her husband, who says, “I’m Vancouver all the way. Boston’s won a Stanley Cup before; Vancouver’s never won one.” The king continues, “I can’t believe how bad (the Canucks) have played in Boston.”

“That’s why it’s a saga, Brian,” Elizabeth says.

“I think it’s going to go seven games,” he concludes.


Now, three and a half weeks after the Bruins conquered the Canucks, Boychuk and Ference plan for their day (sometime in August) with the sporting world’s most celebrated thirty-four-and-half-pound trophy.

And the Urlachers have resumed their routine: A stop at Timmys, where Elizabeth orders her Boston/Vancouver Cream and Brian buys a Honey Cruller; designing and producing the fifteen-month calendars, which hockey organizations will sell to raise funds for their programs; and perhaps listening to a country tune. All this as couple anticipates the Stanley Cup’s trip to the province famous for those heavenly Rocky Mountains, Chinook winds, and Paul Brandt. Alberta: the place the king and queen of calendars call home.

Memorial Day 2011: True Battlers and Gratitude

Thank you, Nathan Hardy, Michael Koch, and all the true battlers who have lost their lives to protect a hockey (and donut) fan’s freedom to blog about that which I am grateful.

1. Aaron Ward’s comments (May 28 2001, 98.5 The Sports Hub) to Boston Bruins’ fans before Game Seven against the Tampa Bay Lightning: “Be grateful for what you’ve got.”

2. Hockey talk on the radio: Fond memories of the defunct New England Hockey Journal and now 98.5, The Sports Hub

3. Hardy and Trupiano: The ultimate sports talk radio team

4. Coffee and donuts ice cream: The Wagon Wheel Restaurant

5. Donut diversity: Dunkin’ Donuts, Dynamo Donut, Adams Donuts

6. Donut books: Time to Make the Donuts, The Donut Chef, Who Needs Donuts?

7. Hockey writers: Jack Falla, Paul Grant, Jay Atkinson

8. Hockey rinks: Valley Sports, Herb Brooks Arena, EPIC

9. The Boston Bruins’ marketing department: Best of the Bear

10. Timmy Thomas: Top Ten Saves at TSN (merci, Gilbert Cote)

11. Hockey friends on both sides of the 49th

12. The Stanley Cup Finals, Bruins versus Canucks:Win or lose, I’ll enjoy the ride.

Dynamo Donut, Part I: To Die For

San Francisco, CA

Sunday, May 8 2010

A half dozen minutes before 9:00 a.m. Pacific Time—when Dynamo Donut, located in the Mission District, opens—another customer in line reminds my wife and I to order the most popular donut. The Bacon Maple Apple, he says, “is to die for.”

Unlike the AMHL/Donut Photographer and I, who will delight in what S.F Weekly claims is the Best Doughnut (2009), our donut consultant and his daughter are regulars. “We come here about once a week,” the father says.

As Team Dynamo bustles about the shop, the line of customers—and the anticipation of what Daily Dynamos will be featured—grows as I read the placard placed to the right of the stand:

“We use Clover Organic Milk for our coffee and donuts. Our donuts utilize organic, sustainable, and local ingredients whenever possible and are always handmade daily by Sara Spearin and her staff. We offer a rotating selection of 6 to 8 donuts per day so quality and freshness of ingredients can be guaranteed. EVERYDAY is Bacon Donut Day!!!”

In the shade of the sycamore trees lining 24th Street, the storefront gate rolls up, and then an employee hangs the thin, rectangular placards over the nails affixed to the display.

First in line, we order one each of the Vanilla Bean, Spiced Chocolate and Blueberry Cornmeal, and two of the Bacon Maple Apple.

“The Caramel De Sel,” whispers our donut advisor.

Now with seven heavenly halos hunkered down in the shoebox-sized container, my wife says, “Treat them like china.”

Twenty minutes later and back at our wharf-side hotel, we converge on the real San Francisco Treat(s) (according to local tour guides, the Rice-a-Roni recipe and commercial were conceived in Chicago).

The Caramel De Sel: Its chewy topping, like dripping water freezing in the form of an icicle, dangles. I bite past the thin layer of sea salt and sweetness and into the core; the middle is surprisingly resilient, similar to sponge-cake, and the orange zest and nutmeg soothe my palate. One donut down.

The Blueberry Cornmeal is a gritty performer (Bruins’ fans: Think Gregory Campbell, Sean Thornton, and Danny Paille). With all the blueberry boldness sans the sugary syrup, the fruit complements the cornmeal. Like the Bruins’ energy line, this donut leaves a refreshing taste in my mouth. And it sets the tone for the glory-getter.

The Bacon Maple Apple is the David Krejci/Nathan Horton/Michael Ryder/Whoever gets the next OT game-winner of donuts. The subtle maple frosting and real bacon bits beckon this donut beholder to delve past the tantalizing toppings and into the fresh forest of apple chunks. Oh so divine, these donuts are to die for.

Contented, me echo una siesta, and I rest in peace.

Happy Thanksgiving: A Propos de Moi

Happy (belated) Thanksgiving, Canadian style. I’m grateful for so much, like a great chiropractor, the opportunity to write, and a talent for learning languages—first Spanish, and now French. The study of the latter is an effort to replace, or at least abate, my fear of perhaps not playing hockey again.

Below is an excerpt of my first assignment "en la cours de français," my first foray into introducing myself to francophones.

Salut, mes amis. Je m’appelle Jim, mais ma famille et mes amis de hockey m’appellent Jimmy. Tout le monde pense que je suis Canadien. Je viens de Colorado—ou trois de mes quatre frères et mon papa habitent—mais je habite avec ma femme à Maynard. Je étudie le français parce que deux de mes amis de hockey parlent français, j’aime bien la musique de Céline Dion, y parce que ma femme et moi voyageons souvent a Canada. Nous adorons la Ville de Québec. Nous ne somme pas fans de l’équipe de hockey de Montréal, mais j’aime bien Patrice Bergeron, qui vient de Québec et qui joue pour les Bruins de Boston. Nous aimons les Bruins et le entraîneur, Claude Julien.

J’adore aussi lire les livres de Jacques Falla, Frank Delaney et George Plimpton; écouter et chanter la musique de les artistes canadiens comment Great Big Sea, Bryan Adams, y Les Ténors Canadiens; manger les beignes les démanche; et écrire de tout ces expériences.

Un de ces jours j’aimerais publier mon mémoire, Gloire AMHL: Une Passion pour le Hockey du Matin (et Beignes); écrire autres livres, et voyager à Nouveau Zélande—bien que ils ne pas parlent français allé.

AMHL Championship Week: A Week for the Ages, Part I

Before the fall season is in full swing, let’s reminisce about mid-August, when AMHLers, ages 18ish to 60ish—from the teen scene to the AARP crowd—proved that, in the words of an NHL initiative, hockey is for everyone.

Tuesday, August 16
Concord, MA
Flyers vs. Blues

“C’mon, Brian,” Flyer defenseman Mike DeLeo yells encouragement to his goalie, Brian Monahan. The Flyers and Blues, tied at six late in the third period, prepare for a face-off in the Flyers’ zone.

Monahan, who surrendered six goals in the first two periods, has been standing tall this period. His son, AMHL rookie and fellow Flyer Daniel, watches as his dad, who has been in the league since its inception in 1998, dig his blades into the crease and then step forward to greet another AMHL regular. The fabled “Peterborough Pete” Kokas is unguarded and poised to shoot from the slot. Kokas, perhaps focused on the five-hole, fires—and watches Monahan, a classic stand-up goalie, snare the puck, wedged between his leg pads.

“Woo!” the ever-ebullient DeLeo exclaims.

Less than a minute later, Tuesday rookie Marc Vallee—who toiled in la ligue mercredi for twos season before he was called-up—skates with the puck, deep into Blues’ territory. In the face-off circle to Cook’s right, Vallee launches a rocket; the puck rises toward the top corner, over Cook’s glove, and then bulges the twine. Six au cinq, les Flyers.

During an AMHL-TV timeout, Monahan mimics the monolithic Montreal Canadien, Ken Dryden. Unlike Dryden, whose goalie stick was perpendicular to the ice as leaned on its handle, Monahan’s stick juts out at a forty-five degree angle, in perpetual poke-check position.

As Dryden perhaps gleaned material to include in his book, Monahan may be pondering his next save. Or maybe he’s reflecting on this season spent playing hockey with his Daniel.

The father will share, by e-mail, his thoughts about his son’s first AMHL campaign. “I think he gets the game, likes the action and was never big on hitting so (the AMHL is) a perfect place for him. Frankly sometimes his passes were what I admired the most and I was glad to see his points are lots of assists. Plus I think he has a nice shot. The guys on this team were just great with him which I appreciated too. Maybe the highlight was his two goals against Dana (Salvo) and crew including I think a tip-in either in the last minute or OT – I don’t recall.”

The Flyers don’t need OT to defeat the Blues, as Monahan’s goaltending stands up (and another goal from Vallee doesn’t hurt).

The Monahans mingle with the Koffee Cup and then skate toward the locker room.

Before Mike DeLeo follows them into the room where the revelry will continue, he says of his goalie’s performance, “two weeks in a row, he’s been standing on his head.”


Wednesday August 17
Concord, MA
Rangers vs. Sabres


Late in the first period, Mike DeLeo, now wearing his Ranger whites, works the d.-to-d. passing with Mike Gardner. The two longtime AMHLers help advance the puck up-ice to their forwards. The Rangers have dominated the Sabres thus far and lead, late in the first period, 3–0.

The crowd, all three youngsters (if two’s company, three’s a crowd, eh?) are fidgety, not for fear that their dad (Ranger forward “Grinder Greg” Longtine) and the Rangers will squander the lead, but because they’re, well, wee ones hopped-up on the donuts they scored from the donut room.

Baby-faced Ranger goalie Tyler Boudreau (pictured above), the only apparent twenty-something on the ice, has stopped every shot so far. Subbing for Bobby Kilkenny, Boudreau watches the second period action: The Rangers, led by fervent forechecker Warren Brown and bolstered by DeLeo and Gardner’s steady backline presence, continue to control the puck.

But Boudreau is called upon when the defense falters, when Sabre forward Paul Anastas robs the puck from DeLeo along the back boards. Anastas skates behind the net and then attempts a stick-side wrap-around. Boudreau is quick as a chipmunk, though, and stymies the sneaky Anastas.

In the third period, the Rangers ahead 5–0, a shutout is all but a forgone conclusion—until Anastas finally beats Boudreau, who seemed to have been screened on the shot.

The Ranger rookie allows just the one goal en route to his first Koffey Cup, and DeLeo earns his second title—this week.

Stay tuned for Part II

Donuts on the Dashboard, Part II

The Golden Globes last weekend, and the SAG awards last night. What a boon, a cradle in which to carry the second installment of this short film.

(Cont’d from Part I)

Scene III, Act II: The Beach

The Photographer carried the Plain donut I suggested, and the Coconut she had selected, toward the Atlantic Ocean. She then scouted a place upon which the sweet spherical objects of our affection would perform their well-rehearsed roles.

My job on this low budget set was security, so I scanned the unencumbered skies for seagulls. The proverbial coast was clear as the Photographer positioned the donuts in the sand. But then a herring gull, its gray and white wings extended upon the sea breeze, swooped onto the scene.

Donuts in peril.

The villain, lowering its menacing landing gear, approached the restricted zone. I flailed my arms to deter the donut-seeking seabird. The solo stalker veered away. (Like Boston Bruin Timmy Thomas’s puck-stopping performances, my security tactics are unorthodox, but effective.)

Other gulls, however, were now aware of the battle for breakfast. I remained committed to the cause, though. Sidestepping to my right, and then to my left—waving my arms all the while—I denied the airborne attackers. They were no match for this defenseman; the disillusioned donut hunters dispersed, resigned to cull the shore for favorable flotsam.

The Photographer, who was able to focus on the job at hand, completed her duties. She then picked up the dirty donuts (their surfaces sullied for art’s sake) and followed me to the car.

Flash forward to the present: The leading donuts are on the dashboard, and my wife has regained her breath.

“It was kind of Hitchcocky out there,” she says.

Yet it’s no mystery that the donuts on the dashboard, which gave such sweet and glorious performances, no longer serve a purpose. They will die a less-than-glamorous death upon arriving home.

But they will not be forgotten. Nay.

Hockey (and donut) gods willing, you’ll see them again on next year’s awards shows (hello, David E. Kelly?). Okay maybe not there. More likely, you’ll see them on a prize puck or in next year’s donut calendar, both of which the Photographer produces.

Donuts on the Dashboard, Part I

January 17, 2010

While Hollywood gathers for the Golden Globes , I’m writing a short film based upon a true story. I call it, for now, Donuts on the Dashboard.

The final scene: Orleans, MA. Saturday January 16, 2010
9:00 a.m. Cape Cod. Powder blue sky. A cold salt breeze prompts me to hunch my shoulders as I stride toward the car.

The AMHL Photographer (a.k.a. my wife) then strolls back from the beach to join me. She pulls open the driver’s door of charcoal gray Ford Escape and then, as she sits down, places on the dashboard two of the largest, most textured donuts I’ve ever seen. She catches her breath…

Backstory: Earlier in the week, the Photographer suggested that we drive to the Cape to mix business (taking pictures of donuts) and pleasure (eating them). We hadn’t been to the Cape since October, so we agreed upon the first scene..

Scene I: Hole in One Restaurant, Orleans
We sat at a corner table next to the north-facing window. Each enjoying a cup of Bavarian Strudel coffee, we daydreamed about donuts and waited for the breakfast we had ordered.

The waitress set my meal before me.

“Those are the fluffiest egg whites I’ve ever seen,” the Photographer said but didn’t take a picture of them.

I had ordered a healthy meal (sans le fromage and with turkey bacon) because I knew I wouldn’t able to resist the, well, pièce de résistance, the après petit déjeuner. Les donuts. (Movie marketers love it when you flick in a little French because it stimulates an international buzz).

Scene II: Drive to the Set
The donuts were not for eating. Not yet. They would first be photo fodder. A dozen of Cape Cod’s best, boxed and beside me, might have been wondering which was the prettiest, the most photogenic. Or which two treats would be selected as the special guest star donuts that might be nominated for Golden Globes next year?

Scene III, Act I: The Beach
The Photographer lifted open the white box to reveal the awesome assortment of actors (playing themselves): the crunchy, yet distinguished Coconut; the handsome Plain; the kooky but delightful Toasted Coconut; the divine Sour Cream twins; the wistful Lemon-filled; the old school Chocolate Frosted; three glamorous Glazed; the secular and succulent Chocolate Glazed; and the new kid in town, Honey Wheat.

“The Plain, the Plain,” I said, because its rugged golden brown features would offer the most promising complement to the backdrop: the ice-crusted harbor surrendering to the sandy beach.

Stay tuned for Part II

Loose Pucks: Pukka, Tuukka, and the Joys of Hockey (and Donuts)

A dozen recent observations:

Tired of the regular donut routine? Try the fresh apple cider donuts at Honey Pot Hill Orchard, where the AMHL Photographer and I stood in just the right place to savor these little beauties, their scent streaming out of the store/donut factory.

Last Sunday’s Boston Globe was fortified by irony: Vladimir Sobotka was the star not of the sports section but of Jan Freeman’s “The Word” in Ideas. In the Metro section was an ad for travel to places such as Quebec and Newfoundland. And below the “Here and there” heading in Globe West, Martin Pave mentions the Winnipeg Bombers of the Canadian Football League. (Also, not so much irony as happenstance: In the comics section, Darby Conley pokes fun at Canada.)

Merriam-Webster’s Word of the Day: Pukka is a first-class word. I like it because it reminds me of vulcanized rubber and rhymes Tuukka.

Tuukka Rask: Expect the youngster (looks like he’s about twelve years old, no?) to play twenty games this season. Timmy Thomas is still the man, though.

“Save by Thomas!” I’m glad Jack Edwards and Andy Brickley are back on the air, calling games for the Bruins, who last night beat the Hurricanes, 7–2.

Aaron Ward. I miss him. The former Bruin is not only a fierce competitor and supreme shot-blocker but also a goofball and a great interview. Pukka personified. Glad he got an assist on Scott Walker’s goal.

From NHL to AMHL, sort of. The Hurricanes, formerly the Hartford Whalers, are 0–2. The AMHL Whalers won their first game in their four-game history.

A free month of NHL Center Ice, which means Hockey Night in Canada is extended to Comcast viewers like me.

Don and Ron. Coach’s Corner. Bountiful banter. Cherry blasted the NHL Players Association for how it has handled the Paul Kelly situation and then cautioned youngsters to tape the tongues of their skates, lest they suffer an injury like Montreal’s Andrei Markov. Taping down the tongues: That’s what Bobby Orr and Phil Esposito did, and they never had their ankles sliced by another’s skate blade. MacLean wrapped up the segment by saying, “The moral of the story is that in the old days, Don had his tongue tied.”

From tongues to teeth. The next great hockey movie: Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson plays the part of a minor league hockey player who’s good at knocking out opponents’ teeth. And looks good in a tutu and wings. The Tooth Fairy will open in January 2010.

Living the donut dream. I hark back to Honey Pot Hill. Ah, the sweet cider-filled rings, sprinkled with cinnamon-sugar. And later in the week, I went back in time, to when my mom had left Hostess donuts, the little chocolate ones, in the refrigerator—not far from the orange juice. Make sure you refrigerate the little lovelies until the chocolate coating is crunchy. Then wash back a few with the citrus stuff. Then go read a hockey book.

Living the Hockey Dream: Brian Kennedy’s follow-up to Growing Up Hockey is fantastic. I’m only about halfway through it but have no problem recommending it now (full review coming soon). Kennedy has a rare flair for capturing, from unique angles, the joys of hockey.