Woos, A Whoa, and Ha-Has: Insights on the Bruins and Donuts (and a Quiz)

Woo! Woo! Woo!

And so on…ten Bruins goals against the New York Rangers on Saturday January 10, 2026.

Not sure if there were more woos! Or CarShield commercials featuring Ric Flair.

How many of the ten goals did David Pastrnak and Morgan Geekie score? (see answer below)

It’s the first time two Bruins scored hat tricks in a home game (Pavel Zacha and Marat Khusnutdinov) since 1964 when Andy Hebenton and Dean Prentice tripled down on the goal production. Woo!

You may be wondering: Why the long lapse in posts on this wicked entertaining and hockey (and donut) blog?

A few dozen of you have a renewed or perhaps brand-new appetite for this kind of writing. So I've semi-un-retired. Woo! 

So let’s get to the donuts.

How many donuts from Atkins Farms did I finish? (see answers below)

When I wasn’t watching hockey or eating donuts, I was doing research on Milan Lucic.

Any guess where he’s playing these days? (see answers below)

Luc’s stats:

12 Games Played

4 Goals

4 Assists

-3 Rating

Not bad. But whoa, the Fifes have won seven of thirty-four games while Luc’s former Boston Bruins are on a roll.

Aside from woos and whoa, some hand-clapping and ha-ha moments for the Bruins:

Zdeno Chara’s #33 number joining the other dozen Bruins.

Can you name them all? (see answers below)

As an MC, Andrew Ference was funny, humble, and insightful.

Not as hilarious as Unobstructive Views with Andrew Raycroft, Tuukka Rask, and Patrice Bergeron or or Bergy’s imitation of Pasta of Brad Marchand.

Until next time (woo knows when that'll be), the answers to the quiz:

🏒Pasta and Geekie combined for zero goals but assisted on a few

🍩I didn’t finish any donuts but assisted on a few

🏒Milan Lucic has been playing for the Fife Flyers of the UK Elite Ice Hockey League.

🏒Bruins whose numbers have been retired

#2 - Eddie Shore

#3 - Lionel Hitchman

#4 - Bobby Orr

#5 - Dit Clapper

#7 - Phil Esposito

#8 - Cam Neely

#9 - Johnny Bucyk

#15 - Milt Schmidt

#16 - Rick Middleton

#22 - Willie O'Ree

#24 - Terry O'Reilly

#33 - Zdeno Chara

#77 - Ray Bourque 

            

White Ice: The Racism – Violence Connection

The NHL. Violent. Racist. Yet evolving—quickly enough?

Whiteness, the ice a collective reflection of the players, coaches and executive leadership, pervades the NHL.

Here in North America, and in other colonized countries, racism and violence go white hand in white hand. From slavery to the 1960s to today, too many white people like me have been silent, and thus compliant with the status quo of brutality against our black sisters and brothers. 

My skin is white. I’m biased. I’m prejudiced. I’ve discriminated. I’m privileged. I can change.

I’ve spoken out about the incongruity and hypocrisy of fighting in hockey. I hadn’t given any thought to the connection between on-ice violence and racism. Not until I started following the NHL’s Kim Davis, absorbed Megan Ming’s Ted Talk about the root of racial violence and started reading White Fragility.

As many in the hockey community seek answers and take action to address racism, I wonder how ready we are to accelerate the exit of violence in our game.

I’m no angel. I have used my body and stick as a weapon. I loved watching hockey fights as a kid. Even today, I sometimes see a Boston Bruin incur a cheap shot and think, get that guy and teach him a lesson.

Picture this: Rabid fans, pounding on the plexiglass as players launch their fists at each other. The definition of violence playing out in front of a crowd. Rage. Blood lust. Our children learn from us and repeat the cycle.

Just like systemic racism, white supremacy and microaggressions.

This is not about why players fight (mostly to protect teammates and sometimes just to “get the boys and the crowd going.”) This is not a rehash of “Should fighting be banned from hockey?” (It already is).

This is about a deep self-examination, a societal shift and our legacies.

How long are we going to recite “it’s part of the game” and, in the same breath, denounce black and other people of color for venting centuries of frustration with a deck that is stacked against them? For reacting to violence that white people taught and continue to teach them?

Will we continue to be part of the problem or consider other solutions?

Can we at least discuss a better way to eliminate racism and violence, on and off the white ice?

I don’t have all the answers. I’ll keep searching for them and ask that you do the same.

To promote healing, let’s keep the conversation constructive, ok? We don’t have to agree. We must listen to each other.

Top Twelve: The 2013-2014 Boston Bruins

Patrice Bergeron’s hat trick against the Detroit Red Wings on Saturday night may be the first of special memories this year—but before the regular season commences, let’s take one longing glance at last season.

I present these Top Twelve highlights:

1.      Fitness first—it’s Zdeno Chara and. Kevin Millar with 31 pull-ups each; the shuttle run and heaving diaphragms gasping for air. Who plays with Chris Kelly on the third line: Carl Soderberg? Reilly Smith? Jordan Caron? Matt Lindblad? Anthony Camara? “Coaches and management,” says Dennis Leary, “have to start thinking about who will stay and who will go.” See and hear it all on Behind the B.

2.      More from Behind the B: Frisbee golf and forging friendships at the team-building retreat. Game One at the TD Garden against the Tampa Bay Lightning. Chris Kelly’s goal on a penalty shot starts the season right.

3.      Same episode—about a dozen minutes in. Matt Bartkowski and Tory Krug talking donuts and listening to Rush.

4.      Tough guy Torey Krug gets in to a fight and then skates to the penalty box. I can’t remember which game is was or who he fought, but I do recall Krug sitting down and then tucking his hair behind his ears.

5.      Halloween Night. My wife and I dressed, like normal human beings, stroll through the North End. A giant spider dangles from the doorway at Polcari’s as adolescents amble about and parents push their bedecked wee ones in strollers. The home team’s attack is woeful against the Anaheim Ducks, but our boys win in a shootout.

6.      Thanksgiving in VA. Listening to the Bruins on Internet radio. To my dismay, the Pittsburgh Penguins tie the game with .03 seconds remaining in the third period, but Krug scores the OT winner. Much merriment. Thank you.

7.      A Two-s-day Night in Alberta. Two Us, two Ks…two points for the B’s as Tuukka Rask earns his second shutout of the season The Bruins beat the Calgary flames, 2–0. Jerome Iginla earns two assists. And Johnny Boychuk returns to Boston to greet the next two Bruins fans to join his family. .

8.      Chief Travel Officer and Ticket Master. Johnny Bucyk, the team’s travel coordinator, carries his own luggage. As cheerful as they come, Chief fulfills ticket requests at the Game Day Breakfast.

9.      The Bear and the Gang, Christmas Spectacular. Produced when leaves still cling to New England’s trees, this video is a winner. Third Star: Rene Rancourt’s magic microphone. Second star: Patrice Bergeron as the proud owner of a shiny new weed eater. First Star: the Bear.

10.  Credit Card Roulette. At Wolfgang Puck’s restaurant, Jordie Caron foots the dinner bill.

11.  Per Johan Axelsson; He still sports the great hair and is still a snazzy dresser. Now P. J. is a scout for the B’s, and he’s on the road with his colleagues and management watching his former team on National TV against the Chicago Blackhawks. The Black and Gold lose in a shootout. Too bad none of the current Bruins deployed the move P. J. used against the Blackhawks in 2008.

12.  Frozen Yogurt Fraser. Rookie Matt Fraser’s admission that he was working off a froyo—this after he scored the OT winner in Game Three against the Canadiens—served as a sweet and serendipitous post-game interview. 

Top Twelve: “Happy” Hockey, Happy Canada, (Happy Donuts)

Last week I asked co-workers about earworms. “Happy,” someone said, but the song gets too much airplay.

AMHL Tuesday Champs: The Penguins

Never heard of it.

But now that I’ve listened to Pharrell Williams’s hit, the song has stuck itself to my psyche and has prompted my fingers to Google the heck out of “Happy,” hockey, Canada (and donuts). The investigation spawned these personal reflections about gratitude, so I present—may sound unreal what I’m ‘bout to reveal—these Top Twelve “Happy” highlights:

1.      Team Italy Sledge Hockey: They could complain about their missing limbs but instead have chosen to be “Happy.”

2.      Happy in Kelowna: Happy (and a hockey player) beats hate.

3.      The Happy Donut: Free Fritter Friday makes me smile like the blue-eyed donut logo. Myrtle Creek, Oregon is on my to-donut list.

4.      Happy Hockey in Hingham (MA): An eleven-or twelve-year old, awarded a penalty shot, juked the goalie—and himself. The goalie flopped, and the skater toppled before the latter could shoot. As the forlorn youth skated to his bench, an opponent skated behind him and offered encouragement or empathy or some “Happy” thought. At least I hope that’s what happened.

5.      Happy for Can-Am Connection # 1: Our friends from PEI, attending the Hingham hockey tournament, paid for dinner. Good times talking about hockey and (lemon) donuts.

6.      Bruins vs. Canadiens: I’m happy that Shawn Thornton accepted P. K. Subban’s apology.

7.      Happy in Montreal: McGill students go overboard in Underground City.

8.      Happy in Halifax: The patients and staff at the Nova Scotia Rehabilitation Centre find their “Happy” place. I especially enjoyed the Hula-Hoopers.

9.      Happy to read about St. Andrews, NB in the Boston Globe: See you, St. Andrews—the safe house, Niger Reef and Honeybeans, in six weeks.

10.  Happy Youth Hockey: Jay Atkinson’s piece in the Boston Globe Magazine highlights the need for more fun, less fighting for a scholarship.

11.  Happy for Can-Am Connection #2: The AMHL Photographer and I will return to Montreal next weekend. Round Two between the Bruins and Canadiens will be over, but Puckbite and I will still be friends.

12.   AMHL Championship: Happy to hear that Tim Cook won his first-ever AMHL championship as a goalie, leading his Penguins to a 3–2 victory over the Leafs.

13.  (Baker’s Dozen) Happy to be writing: Not so much on this site as I’m writing offline to rebuild Seamus J. O’Sheehan’s Castle.

Why Oh Y: Scott Zolak, Vowels and The NHL Trade Deadline

Scott Zolak is not a Caillou fan. What kind of father, Zolak wondered on Monday, would burden his son with a name that ends in a vowel. Zolak, a world renowned linguist, professional Scrabble player and co-host of the Gresh & Zo show on Boston’s 98.5 Sports Hub, defended his stance by deploying the oldest trick in the linguists’ playbook: referencing Greek mythology and the Boston Bruins.

Zolak was bewildered that his comments sparked more reaction from listeners more concerned about the alphabet than chatter about the Bruins trade deadline (today).

Bruins President Cam Neely was watching an episode of Caillou in his office at the TD Garden when Peter Chiarelli, a devout Gresh & Zo fan, marched into Neely’s office to relay Zolak’s logic. Neely turned off the TV and then responded to Zolak’s tirade.

“Zo, well he’s a lexical authority. Although I’m fond of Caillou, such a wonderful little bald boy, we’re going to take action on Zo's comments. You guys in the media will find out soon enough from TSN, so I may as well tell you now. We might have to trade Loui Erikkson to the St. Louis Blues for future consonants, er considerations, and two furies. Yes, that’s right I said furies. What, you think I don’t like Greek mythology?”

Why Loui?

“We have to,” Neely said. “We’re carrying too many players whose first names end with an A, E, I, O or U. And Y. As much as we love Loui, that diphthong plus one vowel really puts us over the limit. We must move these vowels.”

Eriksson, as soft spoken as a silent E, declined to comment on his status and teammates who might be on the trading block and who might raise Zolak’s ire.

Budding stars like Torey Krug or Dougie Hamilton? Valuable veterans like Patrice Bergeron or Zdeno Chara? Minor leaguers like Tommy Cross or Zane Gothberg? The Bruins roster contains seventeen players whose first names end with a vowel.

Who’s next?

“You’ll have to ask Zolak,” Neely said, shrugging his shoulders, “if he’s not watching Wheel of Fortune. He doesn’t like to be interrupted during that show.”

Tune into the Sports Hub with Gresh & Zo. Maybe Zolak will say he’s sorry? Probably not. Why? Oh boy, don’t get him started with Y.

2013 Top Twelve

1. Patrice Bergeron’s game-winner for the Bruins against the Maple Leafs—hear the Dave Goucher's call or from the announcers in Finland.

2. Writing to Pope Francis, asking for his opinion about Holy Donuts in Portland, ME. (Papa Francisco: Espero su respuesta.)

3. Celebrating twenty years of marriage to the AMHL Photographer.

4. Seeing my little brother, Dennis (the one with the most hockey talent in our family and an Avalanche/Michael Jackson fan) and his youth hockey pals and other punks all grown up.

5. Blue Star Donuts in Portland, OR.

6. Publishing a piece at Puck Daddy.

7. St. Andrews, NB: Our annual visit to the safe house where the protagonist in my novel plays hockey and mentioning the sea-side town in a song I wrote.

8. Learning how to play “I Wanna Drive the Zamboni” (Gear Daddies) on the guitar (I know the basics, anyway) as well as playing tunes by Canadians Michael Bublé and Bryan Adams.

9. The Bear and the Gang Christmas Spectacular: Everything from Dave Goucher’s voice to Patrice Bergeron’s Christmas present, to Dougie Hamilton’s red nose to Rene Rancourt’s toboggan ride with the Bear. Fa la la laugh out loud.

10. Tuukka Rask—two Us, two Ks… and Zdeno Chara—two goals—shut out the Flames.  This was a special game not just because Jerome Iginla’s ex-team was at the TD Garden but also because it was 80’s night: Terry O’Reilly dropped the honorary puck, and the in-game music included an a-ha moment and New Kids on the Block.

11. J.-P. Plouffe’s eccentric world where hockey, society, and art all get along (mostly).

12. Reconnecting with my AMHL friends after the Thursday Fall 2013Championship Game. 

Kevin Kenny: Boston and PA Strong

With all the bad blood between the Penguins and Bruins, the recovery from concussions, the potential paybacks and the pending suspension of Shawn Thornton, perhaps we can call a truce. If only for a day.

You see, Kevin Kenny, a Pennsylvania junior hockey player, suffered a spinal injury on November 16. As Boston's rally cry resounds in New England, Kevin's friends and family have remained steadfast in their support: Kenny Strong.

I believe Kevin needs us to surrender our ill will and petty resentments. As we strive to figure out the best way to minimize injuries to NHL players, let's hold Kevin in our thoughts and prayers.

If the spirit moves you, please consider sending Kevin a card or donating money to defray the costs of two surgeries and other medical costs.

Kenny Strong.

Peace, pucks, and happy holy-days.

On Stage(d): Former Players and Current GMs Share Views about Fighting in the NHL

Bobby Orr believes fighting belongs in hockey for the purpose of preventing pests from taking liberties on star players. He said as much in on the Sports Hub earlier this week.

Whether you or I agree with this or not (I believe that we hockey fans have yet to explore other measures for deterring such behavior) matters not. He made those comments in the context of what most people call “staged fighting,” those situations where one player, his team down by three goals, intends to spur his teammates to perform better or at least with more enthusiasm by launching his fists at an opponent’s face and underlying bone structure. On the air, Orr made no bones about ridding these altercations from the NHL.

In his new book, Orr:My Story (by my side and bookmarked to page 249), Orr says, “Of course, no one wants to see a goon in junior hockey. I applaud the graduated scale of suspensions the junior leagues have brought in to deter the chronic offenders.” He adds that suspensions are in order for any player in any league who becomes too focused on intimidation. “And as far as staged fights go,” he concludes, “I’d be in favor of an automatic ejection. There’s no room in our game for any of that stuff.”

In February, Terry O’Reilly said much the same in an interview with James Murphy: “I don’t think that kind of planned fight right after the puck is dropped serves any purpose.”

So if former players are saying this, what about current players? General managers? We know where Tampa Bay Lightning GM Steve Yzerman stands. Carolina Hurricanes GM Jim Rutherford and Pittsburgh Penguins GM Fred Shero agree. Chicago Blackhawks Senior Advisor Scotty Bowman supports these respected hockey people.

Boston Bruins GM Peter Chiarelli believes fighting has a place in the game but seems in favor of eradicating the staged stuff, too. (Listen to the end of this interview with the Sports Hub guys.)

At the very least, we’ve witnessed more agreement about the place staged fighting has in the NHL, but little action will ensue until current players speak their minds. Will the NHLPA, as Bownan has requested, poll all players?

I propose these questions be posed to the NHLPA and professional players everywhere: To what extent do you support stiffer penalties for participating in a staged fight? How open are you to discussing this topic?

Boston Bruins Training Camp: Top Twelve

Sunday September 15, 2013

TD Garden

Section 139, Row 15

Jimmy's Jottings

“What do you want to know?” my wife asks me from her seat fifteen rows from the blueline. “You don’t have your glasses.”

I can’t read the roster, but I can the see the names and numbers on the ice and scribble notes.

“Any Newfoundlanders?” I ask.

1.    No Newfoundlanders. Two mainstay Maritimers, though: Brad Marchand (Halifax, NS) and Adam McQuaid (Charlottetown, PEI).

2.    Four Swedes: Loui Eriksson, Alex Fallstrom, Niklas Svedberg and Carl Söderberg

3.    Whenever I say Söderberg, I think of Irish soda bread.

4.    There are no players representing the Republic of Ireland, but we do have a Kelly (Chris) a Shawn (Thornton) and a Reilly (Smith).

5.    Dennis Seidenberg is from Germany (Schwenningen) not Quebec (Shawinigan).

6.    Bruins blogger Caryn Switaj stands in the players bench area, chucks a puck at the goal…and scores. The crowd cheers as Bon Jovi’s “Have a Nice Day” blares.

7.    ZZ Top’s “Sharp Dressed Man” introduces the Bruins, led by Big Zed.

8.    The Bruins do not appear to have adopted my arena music proposal. (ZZ Top is Texas and Bon Jovi is oh so Jersey)

9.    The new black jerseys contain too much silver and not enough gold. The Bruins look more like LA Kings than Boston hockey royalty.

10.  Malcolm Subban is quick, and I don’t mean Jonathan. The new B’s backstop seems to possess explosive lateral speed.

11.  Torey Krug is strong with and without the puck—dumping David Krejci into the boards, retrieving pucks behind the net, and scoring on a slap shot that causes the Causeway crowd to ooh.

12.  Boos may greet Brad Marchand in opposing arenas, but here at TD Garden I like his spunk. In the skate-around before the second session, he steals the puck from an unsuspecting Patrice Bergeron, and then shoots—scoring into an empty net. 

NHL Music Scene: Shake it Up

Like a 2000 automobile with a vibrating steering wheel and uneven tire wear, the NHL needed to realign its divisions. The league also needs to reinvent the in– game music experience. Boston needs more Cars, and the NHL needs more of what DJ T. Campbell does in the Motor City.

Like Campbell, the marketing department at the Staples Center is on the right track; the Los Angeles Kings ask their fans to vote for the music, and they publish the playlist. So too, do the New York Rangers; the musical lineup sometimes includes Billy Joel’s “New York State of Mind.”

Why don’t other teams ask their fans what they want to hear, or least consider giving “Crazy Train” (sorry, Ozzie) and Black Betty (no disrespect, Ram Jam) a rest?

To jazz things up in each of the NHL’s arenas, I propose that each home team not only provide a forum, an app or whatever to prompt fans for input but to also that they play tunes that pay homage to the locals. Kind of like the restaurant scene these days, the local farm–to–fork movement. Big name bands and lesser-known indie groups would all get airplay.

I dig the notion that music is a universal connector, so why not provide fans with alternatives, and not just alternative rock. Or jock rock. Or hair bands. Give the in–game music mavens a chance to mix their own music and collaborate with fans.

Let’s start with the Atlantic Division.

Boston Bruins: My proposition is almost as simple as A–B–C. I’m talking about Aerosmith, Boston and the aforementioned Cars. No other arena gets to play “Sweet Emotion,” “More Than a Feeling” or “Shake it Up.” Territorial rights is, I believe, a start. How about infusing the arena with what Boston–based band The Heartsleeves calls “neoeclectic soul.” Lead singer Jared Lucas Nathanson wrote a song about the New England Patriots, so I’m confident he could submit a hockey fan- friendly tune to the Bruins, if only that online opportunity was available. A song or two from Western Mass: Stephen Kellogg and the Sixers, anyone? I recommend “The Bear.” Or back closer to Boston, consider Nancy Beaudette. “When the Last Whistle Blows” isn’t about referees or hockey, but it’s upbeat and her voice is “Something Beautiful.”

Buffalo Sabres: I love the Goo Goo Dolls—went to their concert in Manchester, NH a few weeks ago. Great show.  But “Slide,” “Better Days” and the Buffalo band’s latest, “Rebel Beat,” should not be played in the TD Garden or anywhere else but in the First Niagara Center. How about Natalie Merchant, born in Jamestown, NY? She isn’t known for any raucous, raise-the-roof kind of music, but it would be nICE if 19,070 Sabres fans were treated to a 10,000 Maniacs song, maybe a melody from Campfire Songs? Or a sentimental song, say “Reilly,” from Attica, NY’s Penny Whiskey?

Detroit Red Wings: I’ve never been to “the Joe,” so I couldn’t tell you if “Wango Tango” or other stuff by Ted Nugent, a.k.a., “The Motor City Madman” is played. I imagine Mr. Campbell is way ahead of me here. Has Octopus Al (the Red Wings mascot) put feelers out to the local college music scene? Maybe a nascent garage band could be featured once a month.

Toronto Maple Leafs: Great job with barefoot hockey video featuring “Footloose” (and grand color commentary that includes references to Adam Foote and Toe Blake). Play your BNL and Bryan Adams, for sure, but give your fans a voice when it comes to music choice. I suggest Silvergun and Spleen or another “Band of the Day” listed at TorontoMusicScene.ca.

Florida: Tough call on who gets to play Gloria Estefan and/or the Miami Sound Machine. Maybe both the Panthers as the Lightning both call Central Florida home. Who claims Tom Petty and Sister Hazel, both with roots in Gainesville? I do know the team in Sunrise publishes its playlist. The Panthers might look southwest to its in–state rivals for guidance on in–game entertainment, however: The team in Tampa has a music man, Sean Bovelksy. I’ve not yet been to a game at the Tampa Bay Times Forum (or the BB&T Center in Sunrise), but I bet Mr. Bovelksy has a good beat on things.

Montreal Canadiens: “Shippin’ Up to Boston” or anything else by the Dropkick Murphys ought to be outlawed at le Centre Bell. Habs fans have a forum (but not a Forum) to discuss their musical tastes, but the marketing department for Les Glorieux doesn’t appear to post playlists. I like what “Stevo” at AllHabs.Net had going in 2010 but would like to see more initiative from the team. For example, the Canadiens could play Claude Cormier’s song, “Mon Hockey,” at least until Quebec City gets a team. Perhaps Puckbite (happy third anniversary, J. –P.) can offer further insight or recommend a song or artist, but I’m all for hoisting the Cranes into the musical spotlight. I believe in “Believe.”

Ottawa Senators: Not to be upstaged by DJ Campbell or Mr. Bovelsky, Alex Marchand has a good thing going in O–Town. Fans can request songs via Twitter. How many have requested Hall & Oates’s “You Make My Dreams Come True,” quite possibly the greatest get-your-groove-thing-a-going song of all time. But rules is rules. Daryl and John hail from Philly, so the Flyers would lay stake to “Private Eyes, “Wait for Me” and Sara Smile.

More on the Flyers and other teams later.

Portland, Oregon: Top Twelve

The AMHL Photographer and I visited Portland, Oregon for the first time last week. We knew about Portland’s most famous donut establishment but were too busy discovering the magic of Portland’s Alphabet District/Nob Hill and West Side, or exploring Northwest Oregon/Southwest Washington, to do the Voo Doo.

I present, then, the Top Twelve reasons to visit Portland:

1.    Salt & Straw: This establishment serves products from Delicious Donuts, but the Salt & Straw’s main draw is ice cream, many of the flavors concocted with bizarre, but complementary ingredients and flavors. I recommend the Goat Cheese/Marionberry/Habanero and Grandma Malek’s Almond Brittle with Salted Ganache. Hockey fans will find at least one employee who knows the Bruins lost Game Six against the Black Hawks and who knows that the local junior team, the Winterhawks, won the 2013 Western Hockey League championship.

2.    Former Bruin Andrew Ference played for the Winter Hawks (the team changed its name from Winter Hawks to Winterhawks in 2009). Other alumni include Joe Morrow, Cam Neely, Glen Wesley, Brad Isbister and Byron Dafoe.

3.   Portland tends to be Eco/Ference-friendly.

4.    Blue Star Donuts: Gaining popularity in the West Side, there are still too many Portlanders who haven’t yet heard of this shop. A dedicated pastry chef (from New England) combines local and organic ingredients and a French brioche recipe to produce donuts like the Blackberry Compote & Peanut Butter Powder.

5.   Inclined to walk off the calories? Portland is home to steep geography. Climb the Southwest Hills.

6.    Or walk from Blue Star Donuts to Lardo—and then order the Mixed Greens Salad: local greens, rainbow carrots, radishes, fennel and honey champagne vinaigrette.

7.    Drive to Cannon Beach, seventy-five miles northwest of Portland. Park at the Tolovana State Recreation site. We arrived shortly after sunrise on a Tuesday morning, the smoke from burning driftwood lingering but the beach almost all too ourselves. Haystack Rock jutting from the ocean floor and Pigeon Guillemots flocking to the pine-clad cliffs, Cannon Beach didn’t disappoint my wife, the photographer. Drive back to Portland via Route 30 and gaze at Mount St. Helens.

8.    Corylus avellana. Oregon doesn’t have the climate to grow coffee beans, but the state produces Gretzky-like numbers (99% of the U.S. crop) if you’re talking hazelnuts.

9.    Astoria, OR: Get your fill of hazelnuts in the salad named Oregon Hazelnut, prepared at the Wet Dog Cafe. Then consider climbing the Astoria Column—or at least discover the Lewis and Clark influence on this area.

10.  Portland nicknames: The Rose City, Stumptown, Beervana, Bridgetown, PDX

11.  More non-donut food favorites: Savor the empanada (grilled corn, sweet potato & Manchego filling, arugula, fried chickpeas, cilantro-lime crème fraîche) at Serrato, the tacos (best black beans I can recall tasting) at Santa Fe Taqueria, and the build-your-own pizza (pepperoni and pineapple) at Pizzicato Pizza on 23^rd Street.

12.  Back to Blue Star, where this writing is on the wall: “Keep Calm and Eat Donuts.” The Blueberry, Bourbon & Basil is the best-selling. 

The Bruins Test

“Congratulations! You are most similar to:

Milan Lucic

Left Wing

You're easy-going but physically imposing when challenged, and pressure situations never faze you.”

That’s the message I saw at Boston.com, after I took the “Which Bruins player are you” quiz. My wife administered the ten-question, multiple-choice assessment minutes after the B’s dispatched the Black Hawks, 2–1 in OT of Game Two of the Stanley Cup Final.

It was close. With a little more luck, Chicago might have won; with a little more thought on the questions, I might have selected different answers to questions such as these: What’s your favorite Boston neighborhood? What do you think of Justin Bieber? How do you answer questions about Tim Thomas? What’s your favorite city to visit? What do you do for lunch? What’s your source for Bruins news?

I tend to bring my lunch to work AND snack lightly throughout the day. And I get my Bruins news from multiple sources. But the quiz allows you to pick but one answer.

No offense to Number 17, but I’m not a punch-you-in-the-mouth, run-you-over type guy. Power to the people, not power forward. So I waited a day or two and took the test again.

In most cases, I made the same choices. Different answers on two questions, though, yielded a different result:

“Congratulations! You are most similar to:

Andrew Ference

Defenseman

You're a selfless free-thinker who believes small gestures can add up to great achievements.”

I bring home my plastic recyclables from work and flatten my Kashi cereal boxes so that they too can be recycled. I’m a defense-first sort of dude that loves the North End.

I don’t live in that neighborhood, but enjoying breakfast with my wife at Boston Common or a few slices at Regina Pizzeria—where Number 21 brought the Cup in 2011—liberates me from my worries and infuses me with purpose. Love life and help others. Support the Bruins, win or lose.

Winning at least one more game in Chicago will be a test. I trust that Lucic and Ference, and all of us like them, will prevail.

Charles Bradley: Pucks, Pets and CAN-AM Camaraderie, Part II

Continued from Part I

Charles Bradley, black and blue thumbnail and all, is back in business and back in the game. At the Dunkin’ Donuts in West Concord, he’s his same old amiable self as he sits at the table next to my wife and me. Caring to the core about pets and humans like me, Charles listens to my wife describe my ongoing injury saga and makes a suggestion or two from his own experience as a hockey player and animal doctor. (You’ve probably seen the bumper sticker, “Be kind to animals. Hug a hockey player.” Right?)

Stop by Domino Veterinary Hospital (DVH), Charlie says; I’ll give you a brochure for the doctor that fixed my wrist.

He stands up to get in line for his coffee as my wife and I prepare to leave.

We run an errand and then meet Charlie at DVH in West Concord.

Paint greets our nostrils as a contractor applies color to the door leading to the reception area. We shuffle to the right and see Dr. Bradley.

Charlie rises from his chair in a side office and then leads us on an impromptu tour of the new facility. We walk from room to room, Charlie showing us machines for examining and treating dogs and cats.

If I were a patient or pet owner, I’d like the soothing, soft colors—including sage and beige—of the treatment and special procedure rooms and pharmacy that serve customers in Concord, Sudbury, Maynard and beyond. The place is bright and cheery. Just like Charlie.

He’s not about to apply for sainthood and is the first to admit the adversity he has endured in the aforesaid changing veterinary market. He left the profession, and the AMHL, a few years ago to dabble in the home renovation business, but that endeavor proved unsuccessful.

We move on, chatting about Charlie's drives through Vermont to Canada and listening to CBC Radio. Charlie asks if my wife and I are familiar with Stuart McLean. 

Of course. 

We agree that the Canadian storyteller-comic (born and raised in Montreal West, a few blocks away from Charlie’s Loyola High School) and McLean's The Vinyl Cafe program are akin to Garrison Keiller’s A Prairie Home Companion. (Dave and Morley, often featured on McLean's hour-long variety show, own a dog, Arthur.)

We reach the front lobby and discuss the nuances of Canadian parlance.

“He says ‘eh’ a lot less than he used to,” Dr. Bradley's assistant, sitting behind the new desk in these new veterinary digs, says.

But it’s not all about the “eh;” it’s also about the A, as in Yahoo!, Mazda and pasta. YEAH-who, MAZZ-duh, PASS-tuh, right?

“Right,” Charlie says, smiling about a Canadian’s propensity to end a sentence with an affirmative interrogative.

We change topics from linguistics to cross-border cooperation to Can-Am adventures and camaraderie, and ultimately circle back to hockey.

Are you over the devastation, my wife wonders, of the Canadiens losing in the first round? She’s not aware that Charlie told me ten years ago that he’s a Bruins fan.

“I made the conversion,” he says.

In an amped-up professional hockey environment where the lines between rivalry and rage often blur and can block us from seeing the beauty of our game, Charlie Bradley sticks out like a sore thumbnail.

“You call him Charlie?” his assistant asks.

“They’ve seen each other in garter belts,” my wife says.

Charlie explains that we hockey players assign pet names (my pun, not his) to each other, adding an –ie or –y to our first names. “Charlie, Jimmy…,” he says.

I can call him Charlie. And if I had a sick dog or cat, I’d call Dr. Bradley.

The Hockey Show Radio Recap

I’ve written a half-dozen or so pieces about the New England Hockey Journal Radio Show (R.I.P.) but not about the new kid in town. Well, newer anyway: The AT&T Hockey Show on 98.5 The Sports Hub.

I, “Jimmy from Maynard,” was a regular caller into the program that Mick Colageo, Matt Kalman, and Kevin Paul Dupont hosted, and I’m using the same handle on the radio show that Ryan Johnston conducts with Bruins’ announcers Dave “Left to Right Across Your Radio” Goucher and Bob Beers. The show airs from 9:00 –11:00 a.m. on Saturday mornings.

Saturday March 2, 2013

“Fred from New Hampshire”

What a godsend, with his gratitude flowing for a long history of stellar Boston Bruins defensemen. Zdeno Chara, for example.

The big man performs the little things consistently: his positioning in the non–Euclidian corners, extending his circus stick at just the right instant to poke a puck of an opponent’s stick, and putting more pucks on net (I think Big Z has been taking lessons from Dougie Hamilton).

“How special...,” said Fred, to witness that twirl inside the blueline, the giant strides and the backhand shot, short side, shot to score against the Florida Panthers. The play (and maybe Jack Edwards’s call) reminded Fred of Julie Andrews. A Sound-of-Music, “Climb-Every-Mountain” kind of goal.

The Bruins’ Penalty Kill

“I can’t remember seeing anything like it,” Johnston said.

So well-positioned yet so aggressive. Face-off wins are key, too, and the Bruins are among the NHL’s elite. Too bad faceoff.com is already a registered domain, otherwise you might say the Bruins own it.

Beers said the Bruins are a net –2 on the year, explaining that opponents have scored only four power play goals and the Bruins have posted two shorties.

“Paul in the Car”

The moniker sounded familiar. Another NEHJ Radio Show remnant?

Paul said the Chicago Blackhawks, who have yet to lose a game in regulation, are over-rated, that if they had to play in the Eastern Conference, they wouldn’t fare so well against teams like the Bruins and Flyers.

Maybe not, countered our hosts. But anytime a team has earned 37 of 40 possible points, let’s give them credit.

Hockey Music

“…speaking of Julie Andrews,” I said. I asked the fellas what they’re favorite hockey music is, not necessarily songs played during games. Maybe a movie soundtrack?

The question caught them off guard, humored them. “I don’t know” was the initial consensus.

“Maybe something from Slap Shot?” someone said. “Maxine Nightingale?”

A wily producer found the music: "Right Back Where We Started From"

“Something form the Miracle soundtrack?...’Brass Bonanza’?”

“Brass Bonanza” is a song the NEHJ Radio Show folks loved to play. Miracle’s soundtrack was less memorable except for “Dream On” in the closing credits. And for what it’s worth, I find Ms. Nightingale’s love song to be, well, lovely—if not ironic for the backdrop of excessive violence. I am no longer drawn to the movie per se, but I won’t apologize for the soundtrack because “Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word.”

So there you have it, Bruins fans, from the old to the new and back again, from Julie Andrews to Elton John.

Boston Bruins: My All-time Team

My wife asked me who I’d include on my all-time Bruins team. On the bench (and behind it), the list below has less to do with the players’ popularity or statistics than it soes with my personal connection to them.

Coaches:

Claude Julien, Don Cherry, Pat Burns. Who would be the head coach? Would they rotate executive leadership? I love Julien’s patience and imperviousness to those who question his line combinations. Grapes: Colourful with words and attire. Pat Burns: My wife once got special access to one of his press conferences (thanks, Steve Babineau) and developed a crush on Burnsie.

Goalies:

I didn't see Gerry Cheevers play, but I read about him first in George Plimpton’s book, “Open Net.” Cheesie was kind to me when he signed my copy of his memoir, “Unmasked.” Tim Thomas: Before the off-ice shenanigans tarnished his image, Timmy was superb between the pipes and delivered uncommon post-game quotes.

Defensemen:

Sorry Number fORR; I never saw you play and haven't met you yet. My wife and I did fly to the Big D to watch Ray Bourque, though. Ray-Ray (as my wife calls him), still wearing his Boston Bruins-issue hockey pants (magic marker couldn’t cover completely cover the Spoked B) was twenty days removed from The Trade. He logged more ice time than any other player as his Avalanche beat the Stars, 2–1. Don Sweeney, Bourque’s defensive partner, was under-sized and under-rated. One of the fastest players on any Bruins squad he played for, Sweeney’s work ethic and commitment to the Bruins lands him on my list. Gary Doak's  heyday was before my time here in Boston, but I hear tell of his shot-blocking acumen. Aaron Ward: His dedication to blocking shots and his proclivity with a stiff-arm to an opponent’s chest (as well as his fondness for the Boston Kreme) make him a favourite. Hal Gill: Yet another Boston Kreme fan, his most memorable goal was against the Avalanche (February 2003), a crafty shot from beyond the blueline that beat Patrick Roy.

Centers:

Patrice “Selke” Bergeron's demeanor and dedication to defense, as well as his face-off skills, endear fans to him. Derek Sanderson, who was also great on the draw, owned (owns?) a nobby Nehru jacket and a neat nickname. Reading Turk's memoir gave me hope for those who strive to redeem themselves. Jean Ratelle was before my time, too, but my dad (a Rangers fan) rooted for him. I’ve heard only fine things about Gentleman Jean.

Right Wings:

Stephen Herbert Heinze: I like this guy because he had the audacity to wear #57 (but not as a Bruin) and because I owned one of his game-used hockey sticks. I recall skating on a pond in Stow (MA), cradling the puck with that twig (remember my motto: wood is good). Willie O’Ree: Well-known for being the first black player in the NHL (again, before my hockey days), people respect him for his off-ice attributes. For example, he excused himself from his lunch guest to share, with my wife and me (on vacation in New Brunswick), his excitement about the Bruins winning the Cup in 2011. He said that after the Bruins swept the Flyers, he knew the B’s would go all the way. Miroslav Satan: The fire in the outside pit crackled and hissed as my wife and I joined a friend for Hockey Night in Hudson (MA). At this backyard gathering on a Saturday night in April 2010, we watched Satan score twice—the second goal in OT as the Bruins beat the Leafs.

Left Wings:

My wife’s favourite player is Marco Sturm. Whether he’s on a Bruins behind-the scenes show, wearing lederhosen, or front and center, scoring the game-winning goal in the 2010 NHL Winter Classic, Sturmie's smile is magnetic. John Bucyk: More Ukranian than Native North American, “Chief” is a happy go lucky whistler; at least that’s the way he seemed off-camera. Per Johan Axelsson: At a Wives' Charity Carnival (the year escapes me), I told him I admired his commitment to defense. “That’s my game,” he said. That was before he scored this beauty to beat the Blackhawks in 2008.

Healthy Scratch:

John Wensink played for my Colorado Rockies, but I don’t remember any of his game action. His wild hair and how his tough-guy persona is tempered by his fascination with doll houses (as documented in “Open Net”) means he belongs here.

 

 

Top Twelve: What To Do During the Lockout

On a day when I might be anticipating the advent of the NHL season, I’ve been investigating alternatives. So, in no particular order, I present activities for the would-be, perhaps used-to-be NHL fans who still love hockey (and donuts).

1.     AHL: No Evegeni Malkin or Henrik Lundqvist; no Patrice Bergeron or Brian Campbell. But Ryan Nugent-Hopkins should be fun to watch in Oklahoma City. And in Hershey, PA, Braden Holtby will get plenty of playing time. Closer to home, in Providence, RI, Jordan Caron should shine at the Dunkin’ Donuts Center, where the most expensive tickets are less than forty bucks.

2.     College Hockey: Will Ferris State advance to Frozen Four again? Will the hockey gods allow Northeastern University or Harvard University win a Beanpot Tournament for the first time since 1993? Please? Regardless of the outcomes, I may spend some of my income not on the Ducks vs. Bruins at the Garden but on a Hockey East game TBD.

3.     AMHL: If the college or AHL games are too expensive for you, consider the free admission to (early morning) games. With NHL team names, a few former D-III college players and a brand new interactive Web site, the AMHL is action-packed and embraces new fans with this mantra: “Come for the hockey, stay for the donuts.”

4.     Hockey Books: For a though-provoking read, consider Adam Proteau’s Fighting the Good Fight. And let’s say your kid plays. Whose Puck is It, Anyway? should also make you think about the best way to conduct youth hockey organizations.

5.     Hockey Name Games: Who are your favorite hockey players? No need to tell me. Contact “the Rick” at Honey Pot Hill Orchards in Stow, MA. He mans the information booth off Sudbury Road, and besides directing visitors to the Courtland and Spartan apples, he’ll also spellbind you with his rapid reverse engineering of any player’s name.

6.     Cider Donuts: While you’re at Honey Pot Hill, you must smell the donut batter. Follow your nose and stop smack dab in the middle of the donut haze generated from the farm store/donut factory. Then go eat one of these golden and delicious gems…or half a dozen. 

7.     Don Cherry: Whether you love “Grapes” or loathe him—or both—I believe you’ll find the first part of Cherry’s two-part hockey story, Keep Your Head Up, Kid, funny, charming, irritating, and insightful. (But disappointing if you’re a Colorado Rockies fan). Jared Keeso nailed the role as Cherry. I expect the second part, The Wrath of Grapes, to be equally compelling.

8.     Road Trip: I mentioned Hershey, PA already, so by all means attend a Bears game and eat the chocolate. Rollercoasters: go for it. The best ride, however, is the History and Chocolate Tour: chock full of humor and Hershey Kisses.

9.     No Check NHL: Note the double entendre. Sans paychecks, some NHLers are playing to no-check hockey and raising money for charity. La Tournee des Joueurs, also becoming known as the Quebec Caravan League, was created by Max Talbot and Bruno Gervais. This two-team tour features several French-Canadian players in games played in La Belle Province. 

10.  Books, Part II: For a more worldly view of hockey, Dave Bidini’s Tropic of Hockey is your best bet. For forget-your-underwear funny, Paul Grant’s Baptism by Ice is the way to go.

11.  Books, Part III. Ok, so I’m running out of ideas faster than you can say “Jonathan Quick got a ten-year contract extension but isn’t being paid .” Or “Taylor Swift.” But here are two novel ideas: Jack Falla’s Saved and Paul Quarrington’s King Leary. Ok, three. In case you’re not in the mood to take on a full book; you’re welcome to read my budding novel, one hockey sentence at a time.

12. Go On: Matthew Perry’s new show, especially the episode featuring Jeremy Roenick, is a hit in my household, where we’re going on with life without the NHL.

Toronto Entertainment Mashup: Eddie Shack/Bruce Bell

Clear the Track/A Story to Tell/Here Comes Shack/Ring the Bell

Eddie Shack, whose antics prompted Douglas Rankine and the Secrets to sing about the beloved Toronto Maple Leaf, and Bruce Bell, Toronto’s accredited his-storyteller: Their paths originate in Sudbury, ON and their passions converge.

Shack, born in 1937—eighteen years before Bell—left his hometown for Guelph, where he played for the Biltimores in the Ontario Hockey League. In 1957, he graduated from the OHL to the American Hockey League to perform for the Providence Reds. A year later, he ascended to the Show, as he joined the New York Rangers. Shack then took his hockey shtick and continued his tour with other NHL and minor-league teams including the Maple Leafs, Rochester Americans, Boston Bruins, Los Angeles Kings, Buffalo Sabres, and Pittsburgh Penguins. In 1973, he returned to Toronto. 

The same year that Shack rejoined the Leafs, Bruce Bell left Sudbury straight for the 416. A comedian, actor, and playwright, Bell toiled in the proverbial minor leagues of show business, in Toronto’s entertainment district. Never amassing a fortune yet enjoying the gigs, Bell realized that his reputation as a top-tier Toronto performer was taking root. 

Eddie “the Entertainer” played two seasons in the Leafs organization to end his hockey career. Although retired from the NHL, Shack turned to acting. He starred in TV commercials for the Pop Shoppe beverage brand and performed in a Schick razor promotion; the first star of that stunt was Shack’s massive moustache—shaved clean from his face. He let it grow back, of course, and continued his career in hockey show business. The four-time NHL All-star was often a fan favourite at NHL Alumni games. 

Meanwhile, Bell’s interest in continuing his diversified entertainment career waned. Oh, he still loved to perform, to tell stories. He merged his zest for entertaining with his love for Toronto—its history and architecture, its character and characters—and, in 2000, he incorporated Bruce Bell Tours. In 2004, he was appointed the honourary historian of the Hockey Hall of Fame Heritage Building.

Shack, who won four Stanley Cups with the Leafs, is not a member of the HHOF, but he still calls Toronto home. He still wears his Maple Leaf jacket as he walks through the St. Lawrence Neighbourhood where Bruce Bell conducts his one-of-a-kind tours.

update: June 18, 2012
Bruce Bell is the honourary historian of the Hockey Hall of Fame Heritage Building, not the Hockey Hall of Fame, as orginally posted. I apologize for the error.