Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Dream Analysis

(photo of Sigmund Freud's couch courtesy of Nuno Cardoso at

“Doc, I’m having trouble sleeping. These weird dreams are killing me!”

“Tell me about them.”

“Well, one night, I dream I’m a wigwam, and the next I’m a teepee. What’s the matter with me?”

“Oh, that’s simple: you’re two tents.”

After my wife (and photographer) informed me—about 2:00 a.m. Eastern Time on Tuesday morning—that the Oilers had blown a two-goal lead in the third period and that Edmonton netminder Dwayne Roloson was out for the rest of the season because of a knee injury, I tried to fall back asleep.

From then on, my sleep was fitful at best because I dreamt that I was singing karaoke and that somehow—the details are fuzzy—an Oilers' goalie entered the picture. Then I woke up.

Last night, I dreamt that I was in my car in the parking lot of a car wash, minding my own business, whatever that might have been—when a dozen or so swinging foamy tentacles attacked me. The driver side door and passenger seat window were open, and the light blue foamy feelers were ready to latch onto to my limbs—and then a goalie came to the rescue! Not just any goalie. My teammate from the 2003 AMHL Spring Season, Mitch Weiss, jumped into the driver’s seat and put the pedal to the metal to save my bacon. I didn’t have time to thank the AMHL commissioner and Toronto native, whose bad back has landed him on the AMHL injured reserved list, because I woke up.

What does this have to do with Oilers’ goalie situation? I don’t know, but I’m going to seek professional help and then get back to you next week.

In the meantime, you tell me. Am I too tense or is something else going on?
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